Friday, 21 September 2018

September's Odds & Ends

I think this summer was one of the best I’ve had. I loved the long hot weeks in early summer when my biggest concern was how few suitable clothes I had to see me through a heatwave. We spent our afternoons in the garden, Ebony teaching Ember how to swing while I sat in the sun reading a book. They had green smoothie ice lollies every day and I didn’t need to worry about whether they were getting enough leafy greens. I started a garden project and quickly abandoned it so I could spend the summer enjoying the sunshine. Yes, I will probably regret this when spring comes and I see the upturned mound of earth that is the bottom of the garden, but for this summer it was perfect.

The school holidays are short here, Ebony gets just five weeks off from school. We spent two of them trekking about in my parents’ motorhome. We drove to Somerset and Cornwall and then back home again. We had the most perfect two weeks. The weather wasn’t perfect, but it was lovely to spend a big chunk of time together. We spent a couple of days with a friend I hadn’t seen for five years, and Ebony became firm friends with her son, so that made the holiday even more special. Ebony mastered cycling her big bike and spent hours cycling around the sites we stayed at. Ember decided that sleep was for the weak and spent her evenings sat in the cold with us outside the motorhome.

And now, we are firmly back into the routine that school brings. By that, I mean the morning ritual of yelling at everyone to get ready until we are late and there is no point yelling. Our days are predictable and simple and I like that. With Ebony back in school, I’ve been able to slow down a little with Ember. We’re not rushing to catch up with her big sister, so it’s ok for her to dawdle on the way home. She can stop to pick up leaves, open every gate by herself and smell every flower along the way. Our afternoons are spent cuddled up on the sofa reading Harry Potter or pretending we’re not cold in the garden. Tonight we’re going to hunt for conkers because rumour has it they have arrived.

I thought I’d share a few things that I’ve enjoyed recently, I never really have anywhere to put these recommendations, so I thought I’d try and start a little place here for them. Here goes:

Books
A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara It took me a long time to read this book. It is thick, but it is so worth it. The writing is beautiful. I will warn you, however, that it is one hell of an emotional read. I felt a little traumatised by the end and managed to warn Laurie off it so empathically that he actually hasn’t read it. I was completely swept up in the story and learning all about the lives of the characters. Do read it, but have a therapist on standby.

The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver This book took me a while to read, too. It’s not as long as A Little Life but it’s still a pretty hefty book. I absolutely love the way Kingsolver writes and I found the story so fascinating. I really loved the book and I would definitely recommend it.

Theatre
Scummy Mummies - I had heard of the Scummy Mummies but didn’t really know anything about them other than that they are partial to spandex. My friend booked tickets and so we went to see them and they were hilarious. I laughed so loud and I wasn’t even embarrassed. There is a Captain Birdseye bit that I think will now flash before my eyes before I die in the montage of joyful moments from my life. They were so funny and so quick and I will definitely see them again next time they’re in Manchester.

League of Gentlemen Live! again - I was so desperate to go and see League of Gentlemen live that I left Ember after dark. This has never happened before because I am an overprotective anxious-shaped mother and nothing has ever enticed me away at night, but I couldn’t miss seeing League of Gentlemen. It did not disappoint. It was painfully funny, horrifically disturbing and the perfect reminder of how amazing that show was. I don’t understand how they manage to get through the sketches without laughing. There were points in the show where I actually thought I might die of laughing. I am so glad I got to see it live, it was just so brilliant.

Podcasts
Where Should We Begin by Esther Perel - I listened to this after Eleanor from The Bristol Parent recommended it. You listen in on a one-off relationship counselling session and it is so fascinating. Esther Perel is so brilliant to listen to, also, wise. Each episode features a different couple and the dynamics vary wildly. Some of the episodes are deeply emotional to listen to and others are, perhaps, a little odd. I suppose it depends what your own relationship is like. They all make for interesting listening though.

Not Another Mummy Podcast by Alison Perry - this podcast is always a brilliant listen, but I particularly enjoyed the episode with Emma Cantrell talking about how to discuss privilege with children. Emma has had a really interesting career in the third sector so she had some really fascinating anecdotes to share. I feel very passionately that children need to understand about current affairs, social justice, politics and privilege.

Vegan Food
Dandies marshmallows - I finally got around to sampling these and they are amazing. I can’t wait to toast them over the fire on Bonfire Night. They’re marshmallow sized which is pretty rare in the vegan marshmallow world, and they taste just like the marshmallows I remember from my childhood. Buy them!

Veganaise - I discovered this just before the summer and I haven’t stopped eating it since. I am very fussy about mayo and, sadly, the vegan ones just don’t cut it… until now. Veganaise is so good. It tastes so similar to animal-based mayonnaise. I have put it to the test with coleslaw, potato salad and as a dip for chips and it hasn’t failed a single time. It’s also really good on burgers. If you haven’t had it yet, you must.

Monday, 10 September 2018

Ember Turns Two






Dear Ember,

You are two! I am a little sad about it, but mostly because I enjoyed the look of surprise on stranger's faces when I told them that the tall, chatty, confident, fearless toddler in front of them was only one. But I'm not as sad as your dad. I worry your ageing is going to send him into a mid-life crisis, he can't believe how grown up you both are now.

Two years old. It doesn't seem possible that you can have been with us that long. It still feels like only moments ago when we were waiting for you to arrive. And now, here you are, a two year old. You talk incessantly from morning to night. You narrate everything you do and repeat yourself until you think you have had proper recognition. If nobody answers, or if we dare to talk amongst ourselves, you will start shouting, "Mummy? Mummy? Mummy? MUMMY?" Your favourite phrase at the moment is "I'll be back in a minute," which you say whenever you leave the room.

You are such a delight to be around. Happy and loving and affectionate. You love nothing more than cuddling up and playing in bed or on the sofa. You always wake up in a good mood and go running off to find your sister. The other day she told me that she likes this age, that you play proper games with her and talk to her. And it's true. I hear the two of you laughing all the time. I hear you hiding from monsters and taking spaceships to the moon and taking holidays across the world. I am forever walking into rooms to find the two of you dressed in elaborate costumes, the playroom upturned around you, with huge smiles on your faces.

We spend our days just the two of us, six whole hours just for us. You mostly spend this time messing up the house, demanding snacks and playing. Just recently, you have figured out how to play alone. Now, you sneak off and tip out the jigsaws so you can do them by yourself. You creep into Ebony's room and choose books to thumb through. You leave a trail of destruction in your wake, toys scattered across the house and books all over the floor for you to slip on later. You are always falling and getting covered in bruises.

You are fiercely independent, you want to do everything yourself and we are not allowed to help unless you ask us, too. You get yourself dressed now, which means you often have back to front or inside out clothing. You also get yourself undressed which means I frequently walk into rooms only to find you are, once again, naked. You like wearing dresses and tell me that all of your clothes are pretty. If we walk through a clothes shop, you spend the whole time touching things and saying, "It's so cute, so cute. That's cute. That's cute." (pronounced coot, of course).

You love picking Ebony up from school. You are normally ready and waiting to get her long before we actually need to leave the house. You take a little bag of snacks with you so you can share them with her on the walk home. You are now at an age where you can tell your dad about your day when he gets home from work. You chat away to him, speaking in a high-pitched voice whenever you are acting out dialogue from your day. And when you find something you enjoy talking about, you chat about it for months. You still talk about Disneyland on a daily basis, telling me all about when Ebony met Minnie Mouse and you blew her a kiss.

You didn't have a big party for your birthday. It turns out a summer bank holiday birthday comes with its own problems, with all of your friends going on holiday over your birthday weekend. And you didn't get a huge expensive present, because we already have all the big things that two-year-olds like to play with. But I know you know how loved you are. I know you enjoyed a day out just the four of us more than the noise and chaos of a big party. I know you're not bothered about the present and that the real joy comes from unwrapping. I know that eating a slice of birthday cake was more than enough excitement for you.

Now, if time could slow down a little, that would be great.